Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
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