I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize