I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Randomize
