Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
