That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.