can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize
