Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
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It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
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Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
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