She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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