long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
