when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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