I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Randomize
