Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize