He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
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