it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
you're hired as official boob wrangler
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
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