evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Randomize