So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
