how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Randomize
