Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
It's official drugs can't kill me
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
Randomize
