i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize
