D3 body, D1 cock
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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