is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
