Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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