Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize