I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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