I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
porn star boner night. come get it.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
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