My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I'm at about main and main street
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
