Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
