You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
