love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Randomize
