I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
