Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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