I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
