Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
