Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize