He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Randomize
