Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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