and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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