We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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