i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
