I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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