shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
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