Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
