I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Randomize
