fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
He better not be in your backpack
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Randomize
