Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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