is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
