I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Randomize
