I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
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His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
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I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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