You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
