You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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