If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Randomize
