you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Randomize
